It's fun for a grandchild to have tea with Grandma. Grandma uses real tea and sugar and doesn't get upset if the tea should get spilled. She bakes the best scones and sometimes has chocolate covered strawberries, too. And of course, she uses her best china. Tea with Grandma is very special.

But Grandma isn't the only one who can make wonderful memories for young children. Even the planning of a 'real tea party' can be great fun for your children. They will love being a part of deciding on a theme, making invitations, and choosing the food and drinks to be served.

Just like a birthday party has a theme, it's fun to pick a theme for your child’s tea party. Go overboard with "embellishments". Make sure the children know that this is a very special occasion. It encourages their best behavior. The tea can be held out of doors or in your home. You don't need a reason to have a tea party. The point is to provide opportunities to encourage children to practice good manners.

Get Dressed Up for a Tea Party

Make the occasion extra special by asking the children to dress up. Children feel special when they are dressed up. Clothes make a statement about personality and style.

At a young age children start communicating their tastes. Don't demand ruffles and lace if your daughter likes knits. Suitable dress up clothes are available in all styles. Even the very young child shows an interest in certain colors, fabrics and notions like buttons and zippers.

The key is to observe and listen. Most children would be happy to dress up if they were allowed to be comfortable and be part of the decision-making process. The children should be comfortable with their attire if you wish to avoid any retaliation in the middle of tea or at any other inopportune time.

Remember that children are people too. The differences should be appreciated and celebrated. Children have value and their feelings count.

Crafts and Activities for Children's Tea Parties

Do not overlook the importance of planning activities and/or craft projects for your little guests. Children like to be active and sitting still is next to impossible. How about a game of croquet if your party is outside? This activity would be especially appreciated by any young men who may be present.

Children will love making their own version of a Tussie Mussie. Ladies in the formal Victorian 1800's filled tiny cone vases with fragrant bouquets to make their stroll along the streets more aromatically pleasing. These vases became known as Tussie-Mussies holders. Tussie refers to a knot of flowers. Mussie refers to the moist moss that kept the flowers fresh.

Plan the Tea Party Menu With Care

Cutters like these make beautiful tea sandwiches.

Remember that children"'"s tastes are not as refined as their adult counterparts. Children generally would not enjoy the fare served at social gatherings for adults.

Keep the menu simple but elegant in appearance. Use peanut butter or cheese as the filler for finger sandwiches. Remove the crusts, of course, and cut into fun shapes. Be sure to send for our Tea Free Party Recipes to get more information on making finger sandwiches.

'Tea' can be many things at a child's tea party. Generally children are not that fond of real tea but a spoon full of 'pink' sugar will do wonders. You will want to try one of the luscious fruit infusions from Elmwood Inn Fine Teas. Strawberry-Kiwi Caffeine-free Infusion is perfect for a child's tea as is Blueberry Caffeine-Free Infusion,their best selling infusion. Or try chai tea; it is made with milk. David Rio Giraffe Decaf Chai or Flamingo Vanilla (decaf and sugar-free) would be good choices. You could choose to serve lemonade or one of our Cider House Mixes

Always serve the tea in real tea cups, preferably smaller cups that fit comfortably in a child's hands. China teacups picked up at flea markets and yard sales are the best kinds of cups for children to practice on. They are generally inexpensive and will allow children to learn social graces without feeling awkward and fearful.

Treats served to children should be decorative, delicious and easy to handle. Sticky desserts with frosting and crumbly cakes should be avoided. These adorable cookie cutters make sugar cookies in shapes most appropriate for tea parties. Strawberries, brownies and pound cake would be excellent choices. Refer to our Tea Party Recipes for some great recipe ideas for children's tea parties. Serve foods that children like and that are easy to eat. Whenever possible use real china, cloth napkins and flatware or silver. The best for the best.

Teach Your Children the Social Graces

Tea parties are a lovely way to teach the social graces. Children do not even realize that they are learning. Getting dressed up, being at a tea with all the formality, brings out the best in children. They know they are expected to act like ladies and gentlemen. The children's tea party simply becomes a means to an end; a great way of building self-esteem, confidence and poise. The Tea Party is a delightful way to teach respect, sharing, caring, and giving.

Accidents Will Happen

And when accidents do happen, handle the situation with calm and grace. Would you raise your voice in anger at a dinner guest who spilled their wine? No, you would assure your guest that it was not a problem and do what you could to alleviate their embarrassment, blot up the 'problem' and move on.

Do the same thing with children at a tea party. Expect a spill and have absorbent towels on hand. Assure the embarrassed child that it is not a problem. Then blot up the spill and move on. A heart must break in heaven when children are scolded for such minor mishaps.

You surely have seen it happen. The child is sternly chastised, and genuinely embarrassed. The self righteous adult has unknowingly made himself/herself the fool in the situation. Just how important is a cup of spilled tea in the scope of this child’s life? It is extremely important if the opportunity is used to embarrass and humiliate the child. Don’t do it. There are terrorists in this world, a cup of spilled tea is nothing.